This information on The Dominator has kindly been provided by Pat Craven who runs The Freedom Programme ©
To exemplify the differing beliefs held and tactics used by the domestic violence perpetrator the Freedom Programme© uses the character of the Dominator, comparing it to the character of the Friend. The different faces or types of abuse are all aspects of the Dominator's personality which he uses to control his partner:
The King of the Castle
The Sexual Controller
About the Freedom Programme
The Freedom Programme © was put together and is run by Pat Craven and evolved from her work with perpetrators of domestic violence. The Programme is primarily designed for women as victims of domestic violence, since research shows that in the vast majority of cases abuse is male on female. Both women and men who are the perpetrators of abuse can also be helped to change their attitudes and actions, with the new Home Study Course.
The Freedom Programme© examines the roles played by attitudes and beliefs on the actions of abusive men and the responses of women victims and survivors. The aim is to help women who have experience domestic violence to make sense of and understand what has happened to them, instead of the whole experience just feeling like a horrible mess.
The Freedom Programme© is usually delivered as a rolling programme, which means that you can join at any time, and comprises 12 sessions, looking at the different aspects or personalities within the Dominator, together with the effect of domestic violence on any children living in the home.
Find out more about the Freedom Programme.
Return from The Dominator to The Abusers
In This Section:
Boundaries and Relationships: Knowing, Protecting and Enjoying the Self by Charles L. Whitfield
Lundy Bancroft has written what is probably the most comprehensive and readable book on domestic violence, the beliefs of the abuser and the dynamics of abuse. This truly is a MUST READ for anyone seriously trying to understand domestic abuse and how to cope with an abusive relationship:
To order in the US: Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
To order in the UK: Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
Living with the Dominator by Pat Craven is the book to accompany the Freedom Programme in the UK. This book should be compulsory in schools - the information is so clear and so obvious and such an eye-opener! After studying domestic violence issues for years, this is the one book which finally enabled me to click it all into place and answer all my whys. Just read it:
To order in the US: Living With the Dominator (Kindle version only - and well worth buying a Kindle just to get this book!)
To order in the UK: Living with the Dominator: A Book About the Freedom Programme: 1
For a sample chapter from the book Living with the Dominator by Pat Craven, go to www.freedomprogramme.co.uk. The Chapter can be downloaded, printed and given to professionals (solicitors, social workers, etc) to help them understand the dynamics of living with an abusive person.
"I have been on the Freedom Programme and have a copy of Living with the Dominator by Pat Craven and really cannot recommend it too highly. It helped me finally understand what had been happening in my marriage and also helped me understand how my own beliefs had allowed me to get into such an abusive and unhealthy relationship. It really was one of those AHA! moments!
I think one of the most helpful and encouraging aspects is that as well as explaining simply the underlying beliefs and the sort of behaviour the perpetrators of domestic abuse employ, Pat's book also shows us the opposite, The Friend, which means that not only are we aware of what to avoid, but also gives us a much better idea of what a healthy, non-abusive relationship looks like - every chapter in the book ends on a positive. Thanks Pat!"
(Lindsey Mason, webmaster of Hidden Hurt.)
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