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Hidden Hurt Update, March 2012
March 18, 2012

Dear Friend,

Another busy month and I am slowly catching up on some of the articles and stories sent in, but there are plenty more just waiting for inclusion. And loads of poems too, which I will hopefully get up before the next Update comes out!

New Personal Stories

In the meantime, here are a few personal stories which have been sent to Hidden Hurt to share with you:

Fran's Domestic Abuse Story - Fran's domestic abuse story started when she was 15. This was Fran's first real relationship, which turned out to be an abusive relationship including serious violence which almost cost Fran her life.

Selena Domestic Violence Story - Selena thought the whole domestic violence story would come to an end once her partner had left, but it didn't. Years after trying to find an abuse free life, she is still having to walk around with a panic alarm.

Rhia's Domestic Violence Story - Rhia tells this dometic violence story not for sympathy but to point out that you never know what the one thing in your life is going to be that changes you and everything you believe.

Tiffany's Child Abuse and Domestic Violence Story - Tiffany tells her story of child abuse and domestic violence, a sexually abusive father and mother who failed to protect her, further molestation in her teens and a domestic violence relationship

As usual VERY BIG thank you for sending those personal stories in, please keep them coming. Reading about the experiences and feelings of other survivors helps tremendously in realising that we are not alone, that there is a way of escaping the abuse and that there is the possibility of recovery and a happier life in the future. If you have a story to tell or would like to share a poem or other thoughts, please send it to

New Articles:

The re-emergence of the Male Psychopath by Dr Harriet Garrod

And thanks to a kind Estonian survivor we now also have a number of articles in Estonian, links to them can be found on Artikleid eesti keeles.

Call for participants for a documentary on stalking - think seriously about whether you could cope with participation in such a programme before applying.

Dragonfly Film and Television Ltd. produced the Bafta winning series One Born Every Minute and the Bafta nominated Series, The Family. In January 2012, we broadcast two documentaries on Channel 5, entitled, My Secret Past. One featured Kate Thornton discussing her experiences with anorexia, and the second focused on Jodie Marsh’s struggle with bullying as a teenager. Both documentaries were very well received and were applauded for their sensitive coverage of difficult subjects. We are now making a second series of four My Secret Past films featuring different celebrities talking about difficulties they’ve experienced.

One of the films we are making tells the story of Liz McClarnon (formally a member of Atomic Kitten) and her experience of stalking. Liz has been living in fear of her stalker for the last 13 years. She hopes that by making this film she will not only come to terms with her own experience of stalking but perhaps be able to use her experience to offer advice or support to other people and ultimately raise awareness on the issue of stalking.

We are currently looking for people who’ve had experience of stalking with whom Liz can meet with to gain some insight into the subject.

You can find out more about Dragonfly Television here:

Book Recommendation of the Month:

When Dad Hurts Mom, by Lundy Bancroft. This is a must-read for any woman with children still in or finally out of an abusive marriage. He covers the myriad of ways in which children witnessing domestic violence are affected, the prejudice in the legal establishments and the patriartic world has made the life of female and child victims of abuse difficult. And then he gives you tips on how to conquer this situation and help heal our kids from the trauma of witnessing abuse:

To order in the US: When Dad Hurts Mom: Helping Your Children Heal the Wounds of Witnessing Abuse

To order in the UK: When Dad Hurts Mom: Helping Your Children Heal the Wounds of Witnessing Abuse

And Finally ...

A quick reminder. If you send me an email, I will only reply if it states within the email that it is safe to do so or if it is obvious from the content that you are no longer at risk of abuse. I am also not qualified to give legal advice or counselling - if you need specific advice on housing or professional help, please contact the National Domestic Violence Helpline on 0800 2000 247 (UK). For general support and to simply talk about and discuss your situation, remember that we also run a joint UK/US message forum which is very active and superbly supportive (you can find the link to the forum on the left-hand side of all the pages on Hidden Hurt).

All the best,


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