Hidden Hurt Domestic Abuse Information

When No Contact is not quite kept to ...

by adele

Well, the sack of old crap certainly gets about. They are all one and the same guy!!

Although I have to wonder how he could be in the US Canada and Europe at the same time. ! One hell of a man.

My Ex nearly drove me insane. Sort of Stockholm syndrome with loony tunes. And by the end of three years of systematic head games, lies, cheating, thieving, unemployed, and pinching I kept breaking the no contact rule because I wanted to absolutely pay back every abusive violent a****e thing he d ever done.

Yep. So enraged was I that he'd conned me again (his illnesses, tears of self pity, his apologies, blah blah blah, and then bragging about his achievements and conquests) I let him cost me financially, emotionally and physically all over again.

I could insult him, curse at him, throw (my) plates at him and he would laugh in my face. Call me all sorts but wouldn't leave the house until he was ready. Throttled me. And laughed and stuck his face in mine. I belted him with the phone and he wore the scratch like a trophy for a week, so that he could say "told you she was nuts"!

I truly loathe him and that's the bit I want to lose. He isn't worth the energy. He has cost me heavily as it is.

I left my own home and every possession 3 years ago. He was tailing me and threatening me within six months. Same old.

I've tried to talk his behaviour through with him. Asking what I do as a trigger (boy that stuck) but I wanted him to leave for the millionth time to be his idea. No dramatics. No violence. No police. Even told him he was too good for me (he agreed) - then he told me I was delusional (how)? How he had another woman on the go and how they loved each other but she couldn't leave her husband. Bet she wouldn't when she saw his pay cheque (not). Round and round.

Then he reckoned I'm paranoid. He didn't say that. Didn't do that. Louder and louder until he believes it. Anyway if I just lent him a grand I'd never hear from him again (if only).

Who the hell wants to live like that?

He does apparently ... so long as I'm paying.

It is like getting off a fairground ride when you finally let it go. He still rings. It's blocked. He texts also. I have a 500 meter exclusion order. He was so shocked he had a nervous breakdown in his new woman's house while her husband was away. Now he lives with them.

Buckshee. No. I don't know the dynamic and yes I've heard the lies and slander he has been spreading.

Do I want to hear from him? Well if it's through a medium? Well, he did threaten to drink himself to death he just didn't have the means!!

Stay strong Hun you're better than anything he has to offer.

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Life after getting out of an abusive relationship often continues to be a struggle, and It's My Life Now offers guidance to overcoming common pitfalls, blending worksheets with insights on self exploration and ongoing growth. From handling feels of loss and guilt to overcoming feelings associated with having loved an abuser, this book continues to offer invaluable lessons and be a real source of help and strength:

To order in the US: It's My Life Now: Starting Over After an Abusive Relationship or Domestic Violence, 2nd Edition

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