Ruth's Domestic Abuse Story
In Ruth's domestic abuse story, her abuser targeted her due to havivg recently been widowed. Over time, alcohol and drug fuelled rape and battering because more frequent, until Ruth could stand it no longer.
This is my domestic abuse story. Seven years ago I became a widow with 3 kids. At that time, I was very lost and thought I needed a male friend to help me deal with the pain of loosing my husband. This friend moved onto me pretty quickly. I believe he moved into my home just days after we met because the bum didn't have a job and he saw me as an easy mark: a women by herself taking of care of kids.
... he saw me as an easy mark: a women by herself taking of care of kids.
Yes, I was so awed by the fact that he would always want to know what I was doing and where I was going. He would have quick comments about the way I dressed or how he could transform me into the woman he wanted.
Now I am remembering back to the first dmestic abuse incident he really got mad at me when I'd asked him to put some kind of money into my household account because the bum had got some kind of a job then and he was living with me. He started screaming into my ear about how much I was a fucking bitch for asking him for money to help with the household bills. He grabbed me out of the car at the bank and tried to beat me in the parking lot until someone was so worried that they called the police.
Alcohol is often used as an excuse for domestic abuse occuring. For more info check out the page on Alcohol and Domestic Violence.
He was put in jail for some months, but he would write letters to say how sorry he was and how he had learnt his lesson. He was going to stop using drugs and alcohol, and how we were going to be together forever.
Blah blah blah. It's the same scenario that everyone will have heard!!! But somehow I still felt bad for him and took him back. He would buy me gifts and say how sorry he was in the first couple of years. I don't know how I excused his behaviour and ignored his psychopathy, I don't know!!!
Yes, until the last few years te domestic abuse would continue: he would get so mad at me and choke me until I couldn't breath anymore. Until just recently, he decided that he would rape me and beat me until I couldn't move. He would wake up the next morning apologizing to me and saying that he didn't mean to. Yeah right!!
My advice to anyone who still in an abusive situation: don't minimize or deny the abuse. What he says or does is real.
I didn't know if I should run or just scream for help. I was abused like this for 7 years by this sick monster. I endured the beatings and the rapes, and all the money he took from me until just recently, when I finally decided that there would be NO MORE ABUSE.
I found a great therapist and started to really look at this demon for what he really was: an abuser. My advice to anyone who still in an abusive situation: don't minimize or deny the abuse. What he says or does is real. If you're lucky, you will may make it out alive!!! Everyone who makes it another day is a survivor in my book, no matter what!!!!
In This Section:
Domestic Violence Stories
Real Rape, Real Pain explores though the eyes and feelings the actual impact of marital and imtiate sexual abuse and marital rape. A must read for anyone who has experienced this intrusive and long-lasting form of intimate violence. The book does not just describe and explain, but also helps set us on the road to healing:
To order in the US: Real Rape, Real Pain: Help for women sexually assaulted by male partners
To order in the UK: Real Rape, Real Pain: Help for Women Sexually Assaulted by Male Partners
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