Abuse Victim Characteristics
Although there is no specific type of person who is more likely to be abused, there are abuse victim characteristics which people in an abusive relationship tend to have in common or display. These can include:
Although the above list is not exhaustive and may not always indicate an abusive relationship, many abuse victims show many of these behaviours and attitudes or change in some other, subtle way.
Research would also seem to indicate that victims of domestic violence have a higher incidence of alcohol or drug abuse (this might be prescription drugs rather than street drugs) than non-victims. According to Stark & Flitcraft (1996) women who experience domestic violence are 15 times more likely to have alcohol dependency and 9 times more likely to have a drug problem than women not experiencing domestic violence. Rates of misuse of both increase after the first violent episode. According to the British Crime Survey self-completion questionnaire: Home Office Research Study 191, the risk of suffering domestic violence is also associated with increased alcohol consumption for both male and female victims.
Another of the abuse victim characteristics is suffering from what is called traumatic bonding, where, to put it very briefly, a very strong emotional bond is built up which increases the more trauma is experiences. This is why so many abuse victims feel that they really really love their abuser - they are mistaking traumatic bonding with love.
If you recognise the above abuse victim characteristics in yourself, a family member or a friend, please consider the possiblity that they may be in an abusive relationship, seek further information on domestic abuse and consider calling a helpline.
The long-awaited book from our very own Steve from the Hidden Hurt Message Forum as finally arrived!
THE JERK RADAR
Have you ever gone out with someone who seemed perfect at first, but ended
up being a nightmare? Do you find yourself falling in love but ending up feeling
disrespected and used? Would you like to make sure that something like that
never happens to you (or someone you care about) again? If so, this book is
written for you. There are lots of books about how to tell if you're in an
abusive relationship. This is book will keep you from getting into one in
the first place. Jerk Radar will help you see how a Jerk takes advantage of
common cultural expectations and romantic myths to blind you to his true intentions.
It will give you concrete ways to test out his intentions in the course of
a normal conversation. And the Jerk Radar Quiz provides an effective tool
to screen every partner for Jerky tendencies well before obviously selfish
behavior emerges. Full of true stories from abuse survivors, Jerk Radar pulls
no punches in exposing what Jerks do and why we fall for it. This is a useful,
down-to-earth, practical guide to avoiding a bad relationship instead of recovering
from one. Read it today - it just may change your life!
To order in the US: Jerk Radar: How to Stop an Abusive Relationship Before It Starts
To order in the UK:Jerk Radar: How to Stop an Abusive Relationship Before It Starts
Steve McCrea, MS, has worked for over 20 years with survivors
of domestic abuse and their children. He has participated in many local collaboartive
projects on domestic abuse, and has provided community trainings on working
effectively with domestic abuse survivors. He currently works as an advocate
for children in the foster care system. He has volunteered for the past 9
years as facilitator for an on-line abuse survivor community, whose members
contributed most of the stories in the book.
In This Section:
Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men by Lundy Bancroft
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